Survive or Thrive?
I like words. You have probably guessed this if you have read any of my posts, articles, or poetry floating around the interwebs (and on the two-dimensional page). I like words so much that I have built my livelihood around assembling them into strands with other words, more commonly known as sentences. Then I take those sentences and weave them together to make more or less coherent paragraphs and so on. The possibilities are endless.
As a word lover I spend a fair amount of time, maybe too much time, thinking about the words people use to describe themselves. A few posts ago, I contemplated how the word minimalism had shifted meaning for me and how, other than using it as shorthand for the uninitiated when the topic of lifestyle would come up, I could no longer use it to apply to the way I live. This week, I have been ruminating on the word survivor.
Survivor. What do you think when you hear the word? The television series (that I’ve never seen)? Or maybe something with more gravity like Holocaust survivor or cancer survivor? When I hear the word, in its most pedestrian usage, it’s when people refer to themselves or others like, “Oh, well you’re a survivor, you’ll get through it” or “I’m a survivor, I am sure something will come up.” Often the survivor-status scenarios involve health, career, relationships, or some combination of these issues.
To be a survivor means to be a person with stamina for enduring a typically unpleasant experience. The energy around the word, and its variants, lacks a certain life-affirming quality. It feels depleted, as if it just barely squeaked by. That may be the case, especially when life or limbs are threatened. To use survive to refer to less cataclysmic situations or states of being, seems like a disservice to the gravity of the word and to the person who chooses to identify with or is given the term.
I’d like to offer these every day survivors, those who battle a lousy boss, a sucky relationship, or those stubborn extra ten pounds and come out the other side a better or more self-aware person, another word for consideration: Thrive. Say it with me: I am a Thriver! Feels pretty good, huh? Ok, so thriver is non-standard English, but it doesn’t matter—it’s a lot more fun than just being a survivor.
To thrive means to be alive. To grow and to flourish. It’s bountiful, that word thrive. Thrive, unlike survive, connects you to your creativity, to your vital essence, to what it means to be human. As a way of being in the world, thriving kicks surviving’s ass.
I’d like to see you, awesome reader, give thrive a try. Wear it around, say it, live it. Adopt it as your new mantra—instead of I will survive (cue Gloria Gaynor), sing I will thrive! And you know, you will do just that, you will thrive.
We are always getting ready to live but never living. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
more inspiration here!
8 Comments for this entry
shanna
I love waking up to your comments, Nasrine! Thank you for taking the time to read my writing. I love to think of you thriving–much better than mere surviving! Keep shining your light–you are a beacon 
Gerry
Hi Shanna, long time no see…I miss hanging with you guys!! I totally agree with you, words are such powerful thing!!! It evokes feelings, pictures, it articulate inner thoughts and your sense of well being. In your example of survive vs thrive…”survive” has a negative connotation, it gives me a feeling of barely making it!…now when i’m thriving, there is a sense of growth and expansion. Flourish is another word that I like…there is a sense of abundance in that word. Anyway just wanted to make a quick comment. I l I like your work!!!
shanna
Thanks for popping by and reading me! I appreciate it Yes, I use the word flourish in the post–I love that word. We do need to get together soon!
Jen
Interesting… good challenge here. I’ve liked the phrase “I’m a survivor” in the past, I guess because it sounds rebellious and spirited – kinda like me 
I’ve also related the the word resilient… there’s a toughness to it, a confidence in being able to weather the storm. But I suppose “I’m a survivor” could also be interpreted as spiteful, or even like being a victim. I certainly liked being able to say on this birthday that I’m “Thirty, Flirty and Thriving!” I agree that it’s important to be aware of the words we choose and the meaning behind them.
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shanna
Survivor is so victim-y and beaten down. There is, as I mentioned, applicable uses, and I would never want to take that away from someone who identifies with surviving, yet I would ask people that do identify with the term to examine what about rings true. I think the intention, and what it ends up meaning/sounding like, are vastly different. So down with victim-hood, up with thriving!
Kimby
Shanna, I love how your words narrow down to one word and ultimately say so much.
(Lol, I’ve never watched “Survivor” either.)
Marion
Hey Shanna!
Awesome, awesome, awesome! I’m with you – I’m not peachy keen on the word survivor. It feels like I still have the shackle of the matter still tied to me. So, your rewording to thriver says: “Hell, yeah! I’ve step into my power and fully own it. I’m taking care of me. I see many, many possibilities.”
Thanks for continually challenging us to think what seeds with plant with our words!
XO!
Marion
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nasrine
Dearest Shanna, I love how you have added a new profound understanding to the world survive. I never thought of it the way you just described it, and you’re right, thriver sounds much more empowering, much more powerful, not like I am simply surviving, I am thriving. Thriving, “I am thriving” is music to my ears, however, when I say “I am surviving” well there is a core difference in the feelings, thoughts and ideas it provokes. Thank you for sharing this, I am thriving while I read it!
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