Hiding Behind the Veil of Busy
Walking down the street, wearing your favorite green high-tops and a black and white striped sweater over slim jeans (you could be a guy or a gal), you pass a homeless person, a few small birds pecking at some seeds on the sidewalk, and a rosebush pushing against a fence, pale pink buds threatening to burst open.
You see none of this. Vaguely aware that you did pass the homeless person (he asked you for spare change), but you couldn’t pick him out in a line-up. Never mind the birds and the nascent rose blossoms, you couldn’t pick them out, either (good thing birds and roses don’t suffer the humiliation of police line-ups).
No, you didn’t see the birds or the roses or the lady with the yellow hat (lady with the yellow hat?) because you are busy. Busy-busy! As you continue along your trajectory, serious and focused, your friend, a woman you haven’t seen in forever, comes out of the coffee shop and lands right in front of you. You stop, pause, and feel irritated that this woman slowed your roll, but then recognition kicks in and you realize that it’s Susie.
Susie, Hi! You exclaim (note exclamation mark for veracity of statement). Susie asks you how you’ve been and you reply, the same way you always do when asked this question, busy. I’m really busy.
Ah, busy, so important-sounding, such a modern affliction. If I had a penny for every time I asked someone how they were doing and they replied, “busy” well, I’d have a fistful of pennies.
What is it about busy? Why are we so freaking busy? Yes, I know all about the day-to-day pressures, things to be done, and read, and watched and eaten and ad infinitum, but do you ever stop to wonder why busy has become our, your, buzzword? Why, when someone wants to know HOW you are, and instead of replying sad, happy, grateful, you blurt out busy?
Busy is the veil we are afraid to lift for fear we will have to actually take the pulse of our life. If we stopped long enough from our busy, we might have to consider our jobs, our relationships, or the way we live. Does your relationship feed you; do you feel like you are loved and the beloved? Your job, it pays well, ok, maybe not even that, but hey, you have benefits, right? And you feel like you die a little bit each day you head off to work, don’t you?
I challenge you to lift the veil of busy, even if just to peek out a bit and notice what you might be hiding from with all that activity. Sit quietly, meditate, assess your one all-to-brief life and ask yourself if this is the way you want to be doing it. Is it fulfilling? Do you feel intimate with the idea of joy? Are you doing work that you love? Or are you just…busy?
more inspiration here!
10 Comments for this entry
Kimby
Shanna, this was a thoughtful, thought-provoking post. You identified a shift not only in our lifestyles, but also in our conversations. Do we really converse any more, or are we too ‘busy’ to take time — make time — to listen to and speak with each other? (Do we even want to? And if not, why not?) Lots to think about…
Your phrase “for fear we will actually have to stop and take the pulse of our life” hit home. Busy = denial? avoidance? Time to take my pulse. The next time someone asks me how I am, I want to answer, “Fulfilled.”
Sue Ann Gleason
“Busy is the veil we are afraid to lift for fear we will have to actually take the pulse of our life.”
Oh that has been me so many times during the course of my life but right now, at this moment, it isn’t busy. It’s more like possessed. Like if I don’t fit all these passionate pursuits into my life, I might just die without ever having felt the pure unbridled elation I feel every time I wake up and know that EVERY project I undertake is mine, ALL MINE.
No more before dawn until after dark working for someone else somewhere else. I get to watch the sunlight dance around my house. I can move my laptop from room to room carrying my work with me wherever I go. Yes, I’m busy, but right now in this moment busy is happy.
Thank you for ALWAYS giving me food for thought and delighting me with your words. Oh how I love your words. . .
nasrine
Yes, busy bee, we all are. But how busy are we? How do we even mesure busy these days? I love how you remind us to step back, to take a deep breath, and simply appreciate the parts of our lives that we are often too “busy” to enjoy. Today I watched a butterfly with my daughter, and this post echoed within me and I wanted to thank you for the reminder. I enjoyed that butterfly and watching it fly away with my lil one. Ah, those are THE moments that “busy” can never ever touch.
nasrine recently posted..Intellect Event Guide This Week
Kathleen
This is a subject which constantly dances on the edge of my mind, my awareness. I have become more victim to the grip of ‘busy’ over these last 9 months than I have for some time. I rail at it… and yet, on other levels, I am so deeply fulfilled. I wonder at times if it is just a way of seeing what I am doing/being. It IS challenging! It IS full! and yet here I am doing and being it. Breathe. See it otherwise? Drop it into it.
Tracey Ceurvels
I live in NYC, the land of busy, of people with their heads down on the subway and on the “busy” streets, avoiding eye contact and rushing from one place to the next, all the while clinging to their busy lives. I am guilty of being busy, too, but I’ve grown more conscious of it. When I find myself busy, am I really? Or am I just avoiding something and not truly feeling joy? It’s a provocative question and I’m glad you discuss it so eloquently.
Tracey Ceurvels recently posted..Feel okay, wherever you are in the world
Cris:Gladly
Ohhh, this one hits home. Had a realization a couple of months ago about how busy busy I am all the time yet still feel like nothing is actually getting done. I do not like that. Making changes to shift that. But of course, in doing so … I have to look at what I was avoiding and afraid of all along. Doh!
Cris:Gladly recently posted..She is Seen into Being
shanna
So glad you stopped by for a read, Cris! Yes, the whole busy-busy thing is just nuts! We are all burning out and yet some of us don’t even know it. That spinning on the hamster wheel look-ma-no-hands-but-I-am-moving-so-I-must-doing-something motion that many of us maintain is an illusion. Perhaps busy is a way for us to avoid our real work. Not the tasks that cry out to be done, but the deeper soul stuff…
Miro
Dear Shanna, you and your readers have hit it spot on. I had this beautiful realization not so long ago. I was trying to resolve two things in my life, joy and busyness. I came across this beautiful article (http://www.fluentself.com/blog/habits/red-lights-a-love-story/) that opened me up to the space we get when we drop the busy.
When we realize that busy is often (not always) a type of front. Lest we be seen as lazy. It reinforces our ego in that the busy people must be important thus valuable and don’t we all want to be important and valuable and valued.
And then the penny dropped. We are all so busy busy that we don’t see stuff. As you rightly pointed out, we miss the buds, the yellow hatted lady. We miss spring, we miss the child’s smile. We MISS the joy! Joy isn’t about how much you have done or achieved. I’m not really sure where joy comes from but I have a fair idea that not missing these sprinklings of beautiful events and interactions is an important element.
How can we be present if we are so busy? We miss …….all this beauty, all this sadness and all these opportunities to be alive and to be human.
Thank you so much for sharing.
Miro
Miro recently posted..Articles on Shiatsu
shanna
Thank you, Miro, for stopping by and taking the time to comment on my post. Busyness almost seems the antithesis of joy, doesn’t it? I hope you’ll drop by again soon!
Helen Hunter Mackenzie
Shanna, I totally agree that there is an epidemic of ‘busy’ going around these days (I’ve got the bug too) and, even though I genuinely love my life, I can see how the general term ‘busy’ blurs so much texture. I mean, if you ask how I am, and I say “I’ve been busy,” I lose the chance to tell you what I’m working on, why it’s important to me, what I love about what I’m doing, and even what I appreciate about the not-so-hot part of my life. Thank you for the food for thought, delivered eloquently, as ever! xo
Helen Hunter Mackenzie recently posted..there is no red light (how a trip to the fedex office can empower you to move forward in life)